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THE RESCUE

His online photo made me smile.  He looked like a friend of mine at work who I admire. I met him online at Meetmindful.com, and that seemed positive. So we planned a meet-up for coffee, where else, Starbucks (I'm thinking they should put in a private space with red heart shaped tables for us online daters). I've done many of these first meet-ups, but during this one, THE BOOK really came to my rescue.

The guy was talking , blah, blah, and BING! It hit me, he's taking (80%) - I'm sitting here listening (taking 20%)." The taking/giving scale on page 41 flashed in my mind.

AGAIN!! Once again, I'm listening to a guy blather on, he never once looked at me, or asked a question when I interrupted him to try and take part, he didn't catch on. Wow. I ended the date quickly then and felt so grateful for THE BOOK!! I still had the same wave of negative feelings wash over me when I left....the mind talk, but I handled that by remembering that most disappointments are the "little kid" voice, page 98, and again, I was thankful for what I've learned from THE BOOK.

How are you using THE BOOK?

Kathy is referring to THE BOOK, "Naked Online:  A DoZen Ways to Grow from Internet Dating," which you can find at lustierlife.com. She is one of 3 co-authors and continues to date online and post here.


HONESTY &
VULNERABILITY

We were about to setup a coffee date this week to meet. Then I had to confess I didn't want to be with someone who had 2 teenagers. Why did I choose him in the first place? Well, it was a click. Like everything on an online dating site, you click for smiles you like and then...he wrote back. It's then that you have to get real.

The great part of this story was once I told him my honest feelings about raising kids at this stage of my life, he was gracious enough to offer to connect me with a friend of his who is single with no kids. Isn't that cool?

And I hope to find someone for him who wants to be with a guy raising 2 girls. I re-read the section of THE BOOK, where we talk about vulnerability and honesty (Chapter 4, Liar, liar Pants on Fire? page 30).

How are you using THE BOOK?

Kathy is referring to THE BOOK, "Naked Online:  A DoZen Ways to Grow from Internet Dating," which you can find at lustierlife.com. She is one of 3 co-authors and continues to date online and post here.


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