Who do you reach out to for dating advice?
Research from Hinge's Director of Relationship Science, Logan Ury, is discussed in Carleigh Ferrante's article, This Dating Expert Is Begging You To Stop Taking Advice From Your Friends—Here's Why. The article speaks to the dissonance between who we want to reach out to for dating advice versus our feelings about the opinions they offer. While 80% of GenZ singles found it significant to reach out to peers for help with dating, 86% ultimately felt regret about the advice they received and even wondered if they made a wrong decision.
Dishonesty can account for some of this discrepancy. An overwhelming majority of participants acknowledged they omitted parts of the story when asking their friends for advice, and others disclosed that they were not truthful when advising a friend for fear of hurting their feelings.
In short, it's hard to trust yourself when relying on the opinions of others, and it's hard to give objective advice when talking to someone you love. If you're looking for a way to find introspection and objectivity for dating, you could probably benefit from a Chi for Two practice called Push.
The Mindful Online Dating Workshop helps participants find themselves through Chi for Two practices. Participants practice Push into me—the dating coach. I hold my hands up and literally participants Push their hands into my hands. They feel strong, capable, adult, and even sexy.
As participants Push into me—the dating coach, they find themselves less likely to push away potential romantic partners. As participants witness their group mates’ Push into me, they recognize their group mates becoming their Star selves. Everyone finds dating more fun. No one wants advice.
You can come experience it yourself in-person. The details
Online dating can be a whirlwind experience. As therapists, we know that this is largely due to the connection between romantic dances and our unfinished infant/parent dances. If dating is stirring up unfinished "stuff" with our parents, we may seek advice from peers to help soothe the dating discomfort. However, research from Hinge's Director of Relationship Science, Logan Ury, suggests that our friends may be doing more harm than good in the dating department.